The world, they say, is like a global village. But wouldn't it be nice if that were true? Everyone would have that village-level contact, and we'd all know each other by name, and the intimacy of village life would mean we'd live in peace.   Well, you've gotta take things one step at a time. You can't just turn the world into a village overnight. You've got to introduce village elements one at a time.

 

That's why Grumble is having our first Global Potluck!   We're inviting everyone -- and we do mean everyone, all 5+ billion of you -- to come to our backyard for a real family-style cookout and potluck supper!

Don't forget, everyone should bring a dish:

A-Cg	Side dish
Chang-Chin	Cassarole
Chio-M	Macaroni salad
N-T	Millet, sorghum, or lentils
U-Z	Soda, tea

Anyone without a last name, or whose last name begins with a character that can't be rendered in the Latin alphabet, should bring cups or paper plates.

We wanted to make the food more international, but we realized that if we asked Fish's grandma to bring "baba ganouj" she'd be terribly confused.) Of course, being a global village means that we have village problems. Already, Mrs. Rosa McCormack of Enfield, MA said she wouldn't come to our potluck if the Najibullahs attended. "They're always playing that muezzin music too loud," she said, "and they never mow their lawn." The Najibullahs responded that since they live in a war-torn, scarred section of northern Afghanistan, they don't have a lawn to mow.

Regardless, we here at Grumble are still pretty optimistic about this, because we're young and idealistic. Also, it seems like a great way to meet chicks. Danno's wife, "Mrs. Danno" (not her real name*), had no comment about this.   So we hope y'all can come. (Except that van Brik kid from Johannesburg, who keeps toilet papering our house on Halloween.) Grab a plate and eat -- unless your religion requires fasting that day. So drop on by. It's down the hill, make a left, and we're right there near the corner. And hey, if this goes well, we're going to have a global white elephant sale next month. Think of the bargains you'll find when you get to choose from 5 billion people's unwanted junk!